Coping With Discipline for a Gifted Child
Behavior Issues and Anxiety in the Intellectually Gifted
Jul 30, 2009
Gifted children often experience common behavior issues based on the fact that they are developing in intellect much more rapidly than they are developing physically and emotionally. The cognitive boost they feel is like an intense energy drink surging through them most of the time. They are curious, fascinated by the workings of objects, constantly questioning their environment. This can sometimes be interpreted as problem behavior. In fact, sometimes gifted kids are misdiagnosed as Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADD and ADHD) children.
Curiosity to the Obsessive Degree in the Gifted Child
Like the energizer bunny, the gifted child never gives up when he is on the trail to analyzing a process or figuring out a puzzle. He may refrain from eating, sleeping or other activities until he has satisfied his urge to learn about something. Let him be, if possible. He will eat eventually and will get to a resolution of his quest or state in due course. Fretting about his sticking to a schedule will only create unnecessary friction for the family.
Help him delve into finding answers and appeasing his intense curiosity. He will appreciate the support and parent and child can work together on researching topics or finding a resource for him, such a a summer course in astronomy or a trip to a wildlife refuge.
Perfectionism in the Gifted
While it is common for gifted kids to strive for perfectionism, this need not become a neurotic state, as it is for some people who develop obsessive/compulsive tendencies that can interfere with their lives. A child who tends toward perfectionism to the degree that she is unhappy with a result that is not perfect in her mind may benefit from working with a counselor.
In some instances, kids who are gifted will get pitted against each other in highly competitive gifted classes or schools and will develop anxiety disorders about testing and being at the top of the class. Helping the child to understand that getting a 95 on a test instead of a 100 is not a horrible thing. Showing love for her regardless of her class performance and supporting her other non-intellectual interests will help her achieve a better balance in her life.
Discipline a Gifted Child as Needed
Just like normal kids, gifted kids do bad things and need to be appropriately punished. If a gifted child takes something that does not belong to him, he needs to be grounded, if that is what the parent would have done for any of the other children in the family.
If a gifted child talks back and gives inappropriate responses to adults, even if he is entertaining or amusing in the process, he should be punished. Using the guideline of treating him from a disciplinary standpoint just like one would any other child makes sense and maintains equity in the family.
Some gifted kids are overindulged and allowed to participate in adult conversation that other children are not. This is a mistake and will create adversity in the family as well as a spoiled child.
Raising a gifted child will require lots of energy and patience. Anticipating some of the more common issues such as tenacity for solutions, perfectionist tendencies and acting-out behaviors will help the parent prepare for a constructive response before it happens. Treating the child fairly and equitably with regard to the other children in the family will help maintain harmony among siblings.
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